THE BASiCS
full name is marionne rae. b. fernandez; often called raeann; *rae; marianne; raerae; raetarded; rae'nastee; bunso; cookies; youngin' 13. born 061791 in the flip side and raised at the 201 areah at jaycity. filipinaay blood. eighth grade student at cj watters school aka #24, rollin with the wise owls. single, but i can never give my heart to someone else, im still deeply in love with jayj. livin' as an ateh, ading, bestified, friend, besterestfriend, dirt sistar, a leader of unfaded, a loser in ckrime; most definitely love to webdesign, play basketball (when i feel like it), volleyball, and tennis.
PERSONALiTY
smart, but kinda stupid & slow as hell. funny, yet at times corny. can be a real bitch if u piss me off. nice and sweet if i wanna be. sometimes, i can be really mean, especially if ur like, the ugliest person i've ever seen (jk). sensitive as hell, but dont hate jus cos i got a heart. and i think drugs are bad. so smoking and drinking, a very big no no!
THE APPEARANCE
5'3" 107 pounds. brown eyes. black hair. light skinned.
LiFE STYLE
if at the crib, watchin tv, sleepin, on computer chattin or webdesigning. if out, simply chillen, watchin movies, shoppin, doin wahteva with the homayysB FUTURE PLANS career choices as of now are webdesigning, a nurse, a teacher, a lawyer, and a therapist. college decision unmade. gonna rep california baby.
FAMiLY
one mother and one father who both live with me, also living with two sisters (chelley and reya), and one brother (renniel). been through a lot with all of them. parents are highly strict but admit they are okay at times. hardly no contact with the dad and i am most def. scared of him. talking limit with the mom is okay. obviously, i'd prefer my mom better than my dad. all siblings can get on my nerves at times. buh i'd say if i had to choose a favorite, i would choose ma dearest ateh mar/reya. we're not a perfect family, but there's nothing i could do to change them the way i want them to be. the fights, arguements, hitting, etc. happened. i got hurt physically, but most of all, emotionally. "Blood is thicker than water." damnright. and through all the things we've been through, no doubt, i love this family, fernandez represent!
FRiENDS
The amount of friends i have grows each and every year. The most difficult thing to accept is that "friends come and go." I remember last year I've had the bestest friends who aren't my best friends anymore today. Inside, it hurts so bad to lose them and just think of them as only a friend and not a bestfriend anymore, to think of all the moments we had and all of a sudden, it all just slipped away. We shared so many secrets and laughed so many times. We had sleepovers and could confide and trust eachother always. Only a few have gained trust in me; people who I'm really close to. Now that we aren't, I've lost trust in you. Right now, I have learned to accept that. To accept, doesn't mean I don't miss you. Honestly, I miss each and every exbestfriend I've had. I wait for more to come, to share the experience with others and to make new memories in life.
field trip to the jersey city museum was boring as hell, i was bout to put ma ass to sleep, haha freals. came back to school at like 12. then had some free time 'til we got our asses in trouble. lmao. anyways, after school, didnt know i was gona be out 'til jem called me & practically begged me to ask ma mom if i can go. then ma moms like "dont go out. theres alota teenagers these days that are missing" and im like uh yeah wahtever, and she let me out anyways. haha see, i tried all for you jem. i love ma girls, jem&tine! *:} then they came & picked me up, missed our bus. so we walked to the lightrail, then we saw another newport mall bus , and i was runnin to it and was like "wait for mee!" haha while jem&tine running behind me. lol, talks on the bus about shit. then i dared tine to press the tape to stop at newport mall, and her funny ass did! lol.. then walked around the mall, straight up laughin wid these two losers, haha they crack me up so much. funniest shit was at "ZZ's" pizza pizza! haha.. .. they laugh jus way too much, which is so fckin contagious, they laugh so funny that i gota laugh ma ass off too. and the lady who worked there was laughin too! haha.. shit was funny as hell, u just hada be there. mmm, then we went back to the mall, walked round some more & jem hada go byebye. boo >;[ lol. so we walked jem to her mommy & we sed hi and we wanted to show her peter, lol.& then it was me tine & peter, and im like "aint u lovin this peter, u with two girls!" hahaha i was jus kiddin tho.. but oh well, cos two seconds after, i turned around & his ass left us. hahaha, so it was jus me and tine. lol, we make a good couple, do we not? haha.. iloveyou tine! then we jus kept going back and forth, to that side of the mall to the other side then back to the other side. haha, we're just.. too cool for you =) lol. then... left the mall at like 830, took the bus home with tine. had some girl talks *:P haha. then i got home at like 9, haha didnt get ma ass in trouble. =) mothafck, shits a long ass blog. anyways, takecares ppls, dont get ur ass in trouble , stay safe, use a condom! hahhahah nah im dumb as hell, payceout.
HAPPY BiRTHDAY JAYJ. well, sorry for ruining your birthday and shit, but wahtever, i love you. have a good one without me. <3RAEann.
... i've finally learned to just be happy. i know im going through sum drama right now, but u know what? fuck all the drama. i cnt let this shit put me down all the time. i've got a smile on ma face, as long as i got ma frends with me. so thanks ppl for making me smile throughout my problems =)
//edit 7:40pm. i guess its really over now, and i cant deny it, i miss him. but its time to let go of it all. he let me go, and i need to accept that he dont wana be with me anymore. i guess its been too long, & its at that point when nothing seems to matter anymore. i love him to death, and i hope he knows that. sigh* anyways.. school was.. boring, nothin interesting really happned. just got ma report card today, and i gots ma money from ma pops. =) lol. anyways, after school & the community league meet, i & gathered all the shit i needed to drop off at jayjs house.. so i headed for his house, and saw ron & some ppls, and all i kept sayin to maself was "is this nigga high?" cos all this shit he was sayin, really made no sense. anyways, jayj wasnt even at his house (buh i knew that already). his dad let me in and allowed me to drop off the stuff in jayjs room. then i walked back to ma house, and then i see jimmy&jayj.. i really couldnt talk to him (jayj), it hurt me alot to talk to him .. as just a friend. and i walked away as just a goodbye. no hug, no kiss. .. and i realized now, i'd give up anythin just to feel his sweet caress for atleast, one last time. but, its over now. .. &im trying my hardest to be strong about it.
damn, ma xangas so colorful. haha, i sweat it, dont u?! lmao, i feel gay though. all these happy colors. im not that happy, buh im gettin there, u know?! as for now, im walkin with ma head up high & tryna get all these shit off ma mind, so i dont have be too down all the time. however, im not the only one who needs to walk with their head up, ma ladies have been havin mad drama & shit, hate to see 'em like that. shout out to angee,donna&mare, loveya girls, and u know i gotchu women. `;}anyways, today was the academic competition between 24 & 38. congratulations to us, 24 baby! *:} lol. anyways, this is sucha pointless blog, buh ima be so happy if u read it anyways and drop them props, uknow? hehe..so yeah, ima be out now. paycethefuckout.
this week has been hectic as hell foh me. there has been alota shit on ma mind that i needa clear up. buh im not gona bother blastin it on xanga. but anyways, as usual, i'd come up on xanga, saying thanks for those who let me vent to them. i fckin love ma friends, i know they real, stick by me thru wahtever, got ma back and shit. hmm, i'd name everyone right now, buh ima fill this whole xanga page up. anyways, if u wonderin about school, this marking period, im glad to say i got first honors *:) yay! well, ima jus go now. peacee.